# "Give me the crappiest car you've got."



## philippek (Jul 31, 2003)

The 6er was due for Inspection II. 19,971 blissful miles and she was requesting some oil and some coolant. So I drop her off and casually mention that I want the latest Progman because lately the iDrive has been a little slow(er).

Around 5pm I get the call. "Philippe, I'm really sorry to tell you that your car isn't taking very well to the new programming. We'll have to keep it overnight."

Sigh. I knew the risks involved. Sometimes reprogramming a perfectly functional Progman does take a little longer than usual. And sometimes a few gremlins pop up. Oh well. I can do without that for one evening.

My SA sets me up with a loaner, and directs me to the Enterprise desk. The fresh-faced kid behind the rental counter wears a name tag that reads "Kao." He looks up at me and says, "What kind of car would you like, Mr. Kahn?"

Mr. Kahn. Sheesh. My father was Mr. Kahn. Not that he wasn't a great guy...it's just that I'm a little awed to be refered to in the same terms as that man. So I decide to have a sense of humor.

"Give me the crappiest car you've got," I say in the cheeriest, most upbeat way possible.

The young man behind the counter appears to doubt what he just heard. The looks at me stone-faced, a little bewildered. "I'm sorry?"

"You heard me. Pure crap. Gimme a real sh!tbox. You got anything with a manual transmission?"

Kao warms up to me now and has a smile on his face, even chuckles a little. "Well I'm glad you've got a sense of humor about this. The only thing I've got with a stick are MINIs. But if you want crap, I've got a Mazda 3, a Ford Focus or a Prius."

Prius? I've never driven a Prius. And I'm genuinely curious. I reached for the keys, a slim rectangular affair not unlike the key for a modern BMW. "I'll take it."

Kao shows me the car briefly, a fine baby blue example, but really doesn't know too much about it. Thankfully it's a fairly straight-forward device. In 5 minutes I'm on the road, quietly, efficiently, and a little self-consciously. 

The seating position, for starters, is odd for me. Very minivan-like: upright, with a wheel that doesn't adjust nearly enough. The Prius' greenhouse is expansive and generous. Combined with my garbage-truck-driver seating position it makes me feel like I'm on display in my little bubble car. 

The drivetrain is quite the engineering marvel. I won't bore you with the details, but it's a two-stage affair: a small gas engine that only comes on when you need a little extra juice. Otherwise, you're battery powered. The transition from gas to electric and back again isn't rough, but it definitely isn't seamless either; there are audible and tactile cues when the little motor roars to life.

And while that little motor may roar, it certainly doesn't motivate. Yes, I know I should know better than to expect performance from this thing, but good lord this thing is slow. I can't remember the last time I was fearful merging onto freeway traffic. This car definitely inspires that fear.

And you really shouldn't expect much cornering out of this car either. Low rolling Resistance Tires should really be marketed as Low Limit of Adhesion, High Degree of Scary Behavior, Be Sure You're Wearing Depends Undergarments Tires. The chassis setup is, shall we say, biased for body roll in every situation.

The interior is about what one would expect for a $15,000 car. Hard plastic, synthetic fabrics and thin seat padding.

But there were some things to like in that car. I did like the little video game display in the center of the dash. It made me feel like I was playing Tetris. And I did like the faux engine brake feature which captures my kinetic energy that would normally be lost to braking, and converts it back to battery power. And puttering away in total silence, even quieter than the Jetsons, is kinda cool.

But at the end of the day, this car makes a statement. A big statement. Not to say that BMWs don't make a statement, but at least I agree with it. The Prius statement is, well, to put it kindly, distinctly not me.

Yes, I know we have to be more ecologically responsible. Yes, I am interested in leaving a halfway decent planet for my children. And yes, I've watched An Inconvenient Truth. Yes, yes, I know that oil is a dimishing resource.

But driving this car really made me wonder if saving the planet was worth driving a crappy car for the rest of my life.

So the next day I returned the Prius, grateful to be rid of it. And as I got back into my car, rolled into the throttle, and left in a cloud of dead dinosaurs, I became very grateful for the fact that there are still people in the world who make cars for people like me. 360 horsepower and 20 miles per gallon. Good enough for me.


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## ///M3lissa (Jun 23, 2005)

Nice review.  343 HP and 20 miles per gallon works for me :thumbup: I drive everywhere with a grin 

I guess I should be more sympathetic to the Prius drivers I see everyday


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## hts (Dec 19, 2001)

You two are killing me here. How are you getting such great mileage? 

My Boxster only has 295 ponies, and I'm happy, nay, delighted, if I can get my OBC up to 16mpg (I'm normally in the 14-15 range).

:dunno:


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## e60lover (Dec 28, 2005)

should of slapped that kid. Mazda 3's are not crap . haahah nice review.


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## ///M3lissa (Jun 23, 2005)

goodkarma said:


> You two are killing me here. How are you getting such great mileage?
> 
> My Boxster only has 295 ponies, and I'm happy, nay, delighted, if I can get my OBC up to 16mpg (I'm normally in the 14-15 range).
> 
> :dunno:


I'm not sure why I am getting good gas mileage :dunno:

I drive up a mountain to work and down to go home. Its possible the good mileage could be attributed to the downhill side, where I look far ahead and control the engine speed mostly by shifting (little braking or gas).


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## Andrew*Debbie (Jul 2, 2004)

:rofl:

I'm happy to know that even the kid behind the desk at Enterprise knows that a Prius is the crappiest car on the lot.

Work pays for me to drive a rental Prius every now and then. It is the worst car I've driven in years.

Huge blind spots. Off center steering wheel. Seats that are uncomfortable after 15 minutes. 

Ever tried a panic stop in a Prius? Last time I had it out, a huge Liquid Nitrogen truck pulled out in front of me. I was going about 50. Mashed the brake pedal down as hard as I could. Little chirp from the tires and we kinda slowed down. Didn't even pull me onto the seatbelt. 

CR lists 60-0 distance as 143feet. X3 is 129 feet. So is the 'crappy' Mazda 3. MX-5 is 121. Z4 is 117.


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## taco_combo (Sep 11, 2007)

great post


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## taco_combo (Sep 11, 2007)

///M3lissa said:


> Nice review.  343 HP and 20 miles per gallon works for me :thumbup: I drive everywhere with a grin
> 
> I guess I should be more sympathetic to the Prius drivers I see everyday


same car here I would say I never get 20. It is too easy to put your foot into the gas even on highway trips.


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

philippek said:


> The 6er was due for Inspection II. 19,971 blissful miles and she was requesting some oil and some coolant. So I drop her off and casually mention that I want the latest Progman because lately the iDrive has been a little slow(er).
> 
> Around 5pm I get the call. "Philippe, I'm really sorry to tell you that your car isn't taking very well to the new programming. We'll have to keep it overnight."
> 
> ...


My other car is a Prius. 8,000 miles, and I have to say, it's a great car. I know it's "slumming it" compared to your 6er, but for 30k, it's been really a joy to drive. I traded in an 05 Range Rover for it. So it was a MAJOR step down. I just got tired of having to pay $135 for a fill-up in the Rover. I was contemplating selling it. We've decided to keep it. It was a great car for driving to LA a few months back, and it's also a great SF car. I don't care where I park, and I think the sound system rocks. I've actually got leather, nav, and upgraded sound. It's not so bad, really.


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## spydrz (Oct 1, 2004)

They rent Priuses? Last time I was at Enterprise, I had to choose between an Edge or a Mazda 6.


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

dnickels said:


> They rent Priuses? Last time I was at Enterprise, I had to choose between an Edge or a Mazda 6.


Yes, they do. And the plural of Prius is Prii.


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

One thing I find amusing about this story is that the OP has his 6er in for service, and is having computer issues. An $80k car. While of the 15 people I know, including myself, have never had one single problem with their Prii. I find the whole post to be completely arrogant, snobby, and just plain un-necessary. But hey, anyone who walks around with a pompus attitude.."Give me the crappiest car you've got..." has got to be a real piece of work.


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## philippek (Jul 31, 2003)

tommydogsdad said:


> My other car is a Prius. 8,000 miles, and I have to say, it's a great car. I know it's "slumming it" compared to your 6er, but for 30k, it's been really a joy to drive. I traded in an 05 Range Rover for it. So it was a MAJOR step down. I just got tired of having to pay $135 for a fill-up in the Rover. I was contemplating selling it. We've decided to keep it. It was a great car for driving to LA a few months back, and it's also a great SF car. I don't care where I park, and I think the sound system rocks. I've actually got leather, nav, and upgraded sound. It's not so bad, really.


TDD, we disagree on so many things that this really doesn't surprise me 

Seriously, the Prius clearly has a role in the universe, and it's sold quite well so it does something right for a lot of people.

Personally though, if I was looking for something in that market segment I'd be looking at Mazda 3s or Honda Civics. Maybe even a Scion. Similar price point, slightly less efficient but a TON more fun to :drive:



tommydogsdad said:


> One thing I find amusing about this story is that the OP has his 6er in for service, and is having computer issues. An $80k car. While of the 15 people I know, including myself, have never had one single problem with their Prii. I find the whole post to be completely arrogant, snobby, and just plain un-necessary. But hey, anyone who walks around with a pompus attitude.."Give me the crappiest car you've got..." has got to be a real piece of work.


Don't get your panties in a bunch TDD...the irony wasn't lost on me, and it's all in good fun. If the Prius works for you, then you go on with your bad self.


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

philippek said:


> TDD, we disagree on so many things that this really doesn't surprise me
> 
> Seriously, the Prius clearly has a role in the universe, and it's sold quite well so it does something right for a lot of people.
> 
> ...


When I bought the Prius, my main goal was gas mileage. My RR just ATE fuel like you couldn't imagine. I would drive 30 minutes, and literally have used 1/4 tank!! I already had my fun car (SLK 320) for weekends, and my E93 was already on order when I bought the Prius. The Prius has been one heck of a solid machine. Not one single vibration, rattle... anything. The ONLY thing they should offer is a sunroof. But they won't, because of the aerodynamics :thumbdwn: Oh, and I did learn how to over ride the obnoxious beeping when you put the car in reverse!!:thumbup: A very simple fix really.


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## philippek (Jul 31, 2003)

tommydogsdad said:


> Oh, and I did learn how to over ride the obnoxious beeping when you put the car in reverse!!:thumbup: A very simple fix really.


I totally forgot about that, but that was pretty weird...I can't imagine what they were thinking when they added that 'feature.'


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

philippek said:


> I totally forgot about that, but that was pretty weird...I can't imagine what they were thinking when they added that 'feature.'


I read that a little girl's tricycle was crushed because some suburban mommy ran it over. She didn't realize the car was on. Also, for 2008, the Prius will "beep" when making right turns (you can only hear it outside the car.) A blind person was paralized in 06 in San Francisco because he didn't hear a Prius before stepping off the sidewalk.

Aside from BIMMERFEST.com, I'm also an active member on PriusChat.com


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## philippek (Jul 31, 2003)

tommydogsdad said:


> I read that a little girl's tricycle was crushed because some suburban mommy ran it over. She didn't realize the car was on. Also, for 2008, the Prius will "beep" when making right turns (you can only hear it outside the car.) A blind person was paralized in 06 in San Francisco because he didn't hear a Prius before stepping off the sidewalk.


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## AzNMpower32 (Oct 23, 2005)

How is the Prius "fun to drive" in any way?! It's just slightly more entertaining than pushing "start" on your dryer.

The Mazda3 can be crap if not equipped properly. Once I got a base, no-frills Mazda3 2.0 with nothing, not even power windows or locks. That was lousy. Then I also had a weekend with a Mazda3 2.3i sport. That was a bit better. More fun than my mom's Civic, its chief competitor. But I didn't like it...........I'm too mature for the childish stuff/quirks of that thing.


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## brkf (May 26, 2003)

AzNMpower32 said:


> How is the Prius "fun to drive" in any way?! It's just slightly more entertaining than pushing "start" on your dryer.
> 
> The Mazda3 can be crap if not equipped properly. Once I got a base, no-frills Mazda3 2.0 with nothing, not even power windows or locks. That was lousy. Then I also had a weekend with a Mazda3 2.3i sport. That was a bit better. More fun than my mom's Civic, its chief competitor. But I didn't like it...........I'm too mature for the childish stuff/quirks of that thing.


The prius to me is fun because it's a direct challenge. Everytime I drive my mother-in-law to be's 2007 Prius I find myself engaged in a personal challenge. I strive to get the best mileage possible. With her old Civic Hybrid I'd get over 45 mpg on trips to and from LA. With the Prius I'm having trouble getting above the mid 40s.

So to me, it's like golf or tetris or any other personal game where you're always trying to get a better score.

Mazda3 would be my choice over the Civic in a second. Heck, i'd take a 2.3 over even a Civic Si. The 3 feels pretty good; mind you it's not nearly as much fun to drive as the 03 Protege ES but it's fun. The ES was so neutral and light you could easily dial in oversteer on corners. Great fun, that little car.

Funny how the guy came in with a 6 and he's calling the Mazda3 crap. To each his own. An 80k 3800 lbs sled is the antithesis of fun to me. Heck, the 3600 lbs e90 isn't even that much fun.


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## tommydogsdad (Feb 15, 2007)

blueguydotcom said:


> *The prius to me is fun because it's a direct challenge. Everytime I drive my mother-in-law to be's 2007 Prius I find myself engaged in a personal challenge. I strive to get the best mileage possible. With her old Civic Hybrid I'd get over 45 mpg on trips to and from LA. With the Prius I'm having trouble getting above the mid 40s.
> 
> So to me, it's like golf or tetris or any other personal game where you're always trying to get a better score. *
> 
> ...


After about one month of ownership, you quickly get over that. You don't view it as a game. You actually learn how to drive the car for the best mileage possible, and then it becomes natural. I use to have it on the "Consuption Screen" all the time. Now I put the map display on (navigation screen), so I drive safely, and don't continuoulsy look at the monitor. I average about 44-52. That's a wide range I know, but it's completely dependent upon my driving situation. If I'm highway, it's 44mpg. If I'm mostly in the city, it's about 50mpg. I have never averaged above 55, with the exception of Memorial Day, when I was in the most ridiculous bumper to bumper traffic coming home on I-80. I managed a whopping 80mpg!:yikes::yikes::yikes:


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